The newly inaugurated prize “Master of Puppets” goes to… Dead Silence.
A evil supergenious villain with so many mehcanisms and layers of mysticism, it puts HumanBatMonster (from Jeepers Creepers’ fame) to shame. She is ventriloquist level 100. She can make her voice appear as if it’s coming from behind you, collects voices, can make a puppet out of anything, herself lives in a puppet, has a puppet controling another puppet, can steal your voice, make everything silent, appear out of nowhere, and of course, she’s also a physical monster with a tongue collection.
A ridiculous cop who doesn’t follow proper procedures, is obsessed with a puppet, never calls backup, and shaves in every scene. Oh, and also he loves doughnuts and objectifying women.
A town of people who say “fuck the police” whatever happens to them.
Everything we need in a movie is right here. Very good job, very good choice.
This movie could also apply for the “Mystical Dismemberment” family of prizes, category “Mystical Reassembly”. The family of prizes, of course, consists of the original prize being dismembered into several categories in the great award ceremony on 2021 where it had come to our attention that this prize needs to be separated into categories.
Moral of the story is: don’t mess with a woman with a project.
Analog dumbometer: -157, +340. It was a good one, so I don’t want to subtract. But I don’t want to add the 157, because it wasn’t . Let’s keep the 340, and then we also give it a prize.
Digital dumbometer: 52. And a song.
Final score: 392
Prize: Master of Puppets
Song:
Monsters and puppets and stupid policemen,
symbols and clowns and a town full of weirdos,
villanous women who must entertain,
these are a few of my favourite things…